Fall

Fall is officially upon us...season of hats and coats that are too short in the sleeves, left over from last year.

Conversations with Cole

Cole, while procrastinating going to sleep:

Cole: "MAMA, I HEARD A NOISE.  SOME THUMPING."

Me: "It's ok, buddy, it's just me putting some stuff away."

Cole: "OK MAMA.  GOOD NIGHT."

Me: "Good night Cole."

Cole: "THANK YOU MAMA."

Me: "You're welcome."

Cole: "THANK YOU MAMA.  GOOD NIGHT MAMA."

Me: "Yes, good night Cole."

Cole: "GOOD NIGHT!"

Me: " Good night, no more talking please."

Cole: "OK.  THAT'S A GOOD IDEA."

...

Cole: "I SAID, THAT'S A GOOD IDEA, MAMA."

Me: "Ok Cole.  Good night. No more talking."

Cole: "OK MAMA.  I LOVE YOU."

Me: "I love you too."

Cole: "THANK YOU MAMA."

Me: "You're welcome.  Good night."

Cole: "YOU'RE WELCOME MAMA."

Me: "Yes son.  GOOD NIGHT!"

Cole: "GOOD NIGHT MAMA!"

...

Cole: "GOOD NIGHT MAMA, I SAID!"

Me: "Cole...I'm not talking anymore.  It's naptime."

Cole: "OK MAMA."

Cole's Friends

One of Cole's new favorite things to do?  Right before he lies down to sleep at night, he asks me to help him list his friends:

"EMILY, DEANO, AND GRANT ARE MY FRIENDS!  MR. MARK AND PEPINS ARE MY FRIENDS! MISS NINA MY FRIEND! CHLOE IS MY FRIEND! KK AND SEAN AND DECLAN BOY AND BABY INARA ARE MY FRIENDS! COLE HAS SO MANY FRIENDS!"

Oh my son.  I just wish I could bottle up this confidence and help you keep it forever.  Right now, Cole has no inkling that there is anyone out there who might not be his friend.  Right now, everyone loves and adores him as much as he loves and adores everyone else.  What an amazing feeling, right?

As a mama, I actually feel more concerned about Cole's emotional well-being than physical.  I can protect from physically getting hurt.  I can put on a helmet, strap him in his car seat, put sunscreen on his body - tangible ways to protect and shelter him from physical pain.  But emotional pain?  The kind that happens when you feel like you don't have any friends or someone makes fun of you or you are the only one not invited to a party - that's the kind of emotional pain I can't protect Cole from.  And it breaks my heart.  I cannot bear the thought that someday he may come home in tears, a red blush of embarrassment staining his face as he tells me that someone teased him at school; he was picked last for a team; he was embarrassed by a teacher.  I wish so badly to shelter him forever from those painful emotions, to keep him at home with me where I know he is safe and loved by everyone he comes into contact with.   

My boy, I know I can't protect you forever.  Someday soon, you will go off to preschool and then school.  I hate to say it, but you might have to be around some people who aren't your friends - whether its by your choice or theirs.  But please, please remember this: You are so loved.  I know that may not be much consolation when you are ten and your best friend won't eat lunch with you in the cafeteria anymore; or when you are thirteen and don't make the team; or when you are sixteen and you get turned down by the girl you asked to prom. 

But if I have learned anything in my twenty eight years of living, it's that anyone who treats you that way is simply not worth knowing.  The important people?  The ones who will stick around and help give meaning to your life?  They are the ones who won't make you feel bad, who will treat your feelings and emotions as gently as their own - and they are the ones worth waiting for.

I hope to teach you, my son, the kind of confidence in yourself that will power you through those (God willing) few and far between emotional hardships.  Hold onto that love of yourself and don't ever let anyone take it away.

Malala Yousafzai

I am left absolutely speechless by this video clip.  That doesn't happen very often, let me tell you.

This young woman is amazing.  A hero.  A true selfless, courageous, and incredibly intelligent young woman. 

I know our government isn't working very well together right now.  My Facebook feed is full of news blurbs and people's opinions about who is to blame and spouting off terms like "socialist government" and name calling.  But this...this put things into perspective. 

I don't think often enough about how truly amazing it is that we CAN complain about our government.  That while things aren't working great right now, at least they have the possibility of change, of compromise, of making things better for everyone.  That while I strongly dislike our education system right now, at least we HAVE an education system that everyone is allowed to participate in. 

Yup...PERSPECTIVE.  Yet another amazing thing that education/learning gives us.  I'm so grateful for a little bit of perspective today.

Refreshed

I've been feeling a little off lately.  A little grumpy, a little less patient.  I know the cause - a laundry list of pregnancy symptoms that are bringing me down: severe nausea and food aversions even though I'm 25 weeks, heartburn so bad it's keeping me up all night (and as a result, no sleep), and generally being uncomfortable (and so not looking forward to the next three months, where I will continue to be even larger and more uncomfortable!).

But I've been trying to make a real effort to improve my attitude - and without a doubt, one of the best ways to do that is an afternoon outside with my boys.  A brisk walk in some perfect fresh fall weather...seeing Cole's smiling face and pure joy...and good conversation with my hubby.  Just the medicine I needed to feel refreshed and ready to tackle my third trimester.

How We're Doing

How we're doing:

Winning

• Behavior
• Seriously, Cole is one of the best behaved little boys.  He is cooperative and thoughtful, quick to apologize if he makes a mistake.  He's extremely thoughtful (often telling me how he'll take care of me, or to "BE CAREFUL, MAMA! NO HURT BABY IN TUMMY!"). 
• Helping out
• BIGGEST. HELPER. EVER.  I know it comes with the preschool territory and all, but he is SUCH a help.  He's always willing to help with anything - laundry, cleaning, unloading the dishwasher, cooking... you name it, Cole's there to assist! 
• Speech and Language
• Amazing.  You'd never guess this kid had a speech delay.  Our last little goal with him was to help him refer to himself in the first person (he would always say "THAT'S COLE'S!") and he's doing so well.  He still has trouble pronouncing his "r's", which come out as "w's", but he's very clear and understandable despite that.  I'm not concerned - I know that's the trickiest sound and it will likely correct itself by the time he starts kindergarten.  We've been extremely impressed with his use of bigger words, too: "MAMA, WHAT ARE MY OPTIONS FOR BREAKFAST?", "DAT'S AN AMPERSAND!".
• Manners, with us
• Still working on helping Cole become less shy and more confident with other people, but with us, his manners are fantastic.  He melts my heart on a regular basis - "THANK YOU FOR GETTING ME MILK, MAMA! THANK YOU!"  "YOU GOT ME DIS SHIRT? THANK YOU FOR GETTING ME DIS SHIRT!"  and he's just starting to get the hang of regularly saying "please" and "may I".
• Being a big brother
• Oh my heart, this boy of mine is going to be the BEST big brother ever!  No joke, he is beyond sweet and tender with his baby brother already.  Many times a day, Cole will ask us to sit down so he can snuggle "HIS BABY" and feel him kick, rub and pat my belly, and plant kisses.  It's the best.

Working on

• Listening.  Not, like, listening to directions...but about five hundred times a day he will ask a question and after I've answered it he'll say, "WHAT YOU SAID, MAMA?".  Grr.  Seriously, nothing more annoying than telling him a long and complicated answer (like the answer to "WHY IS THE SKY BLUE?") and then have him want you to say it again.  Even worse?  After the second time I repeat it, he asks again, "WHAT YOU SAID?" oh no you didn't.  So I'm really working with him on LISTENING the first time someone says something to him. 

• Knowing that sometimes, Mama or Daddy has to do it for him.  I make serious effort to have Cole do as much as possible - get out his own cup and plate, help pour the milk, start his bath, let the dogs out, etc.  But sometimes, when I'm starving and he's taking ten minutes to choose syrup or honey on his pancakes, and I go ahead and put the lid on his milk so I can sit down and eat...and then Cole melts down because "I WANT TO DO IT! I WANT TO PUT LID ON MILK!!" and how dare I not know that HE wanted to do it??  I've been explaining to him that sometimes he has to choose between helping with two things - he'll do one and I'll do the other.  There's a fine line for me between allowing, fostering (and relishing) his independence while still teaching him that I'm a person too and if I have some needs that have to be met (eating, peeing, etc), his independence needs to also be considerate of others. It's a work in progress.

• Keeping in control of his body.  I know this is total normal preschool behavior, but we've been working really hard with Cole to keep his body in control.  Little things, like rushing and going too fast when closing the door (and closing Chloe's head in the door because of that); or slamming the lid to the toilet seat down because he was in too much of a hurry; or pulling/jumping/pushing us when we're being silly because he wants to wrestle.  Frequently I remind him to slow down and pay attention to his body, to keep his body in control.  He's still learning so much about social behavior (specifically, when it's appropriate to wrestle and roughhouse and when it's not) and occasionally I feel a little overwhelmed and frustrated when I'd like to play with him WITHOUT wrestling... but he's learning and I'm so thankful that he's never mean or malicious, he's just wanting to play.  We've been working on having set times and places for some roughhouse play (and asking before he just starts tackling Daddy), so he doesn't just come up to us and start jumping on us or pulling at our clothes in the middle of getting ready to go out.  Also, since the weather has cooled so much, it's been easier to send him outside to chase and play with the dogs, so he's learning where it's appropriate to chase the dogs (NOT inside). 

All in all, we're doing awesome and we could not be more proud of our little man!

Apple Picking

One of my very favorite parts of being a parent is doing all those fantastic and fun activities - and fall has SO MANY opportunities for fun!

This morning we went apple picking - I've never been, so I wasn't sure what to expect.  OH MY GOSH you guys it was beyond fun!  Cole had the best time running around with his friends, picking as many apples off the trees as he could reach.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Enjoying delicious pumpkin butterscotch muffins and pumpkin cookies!

 

 

 

 

 

 Cole wanted to get in on all the photos!

 

 

A perfect morning!  Next up, making some apple butter with all our apples!