Mother's Day

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in

my heart)i am never without it(anywhere

i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done

by only me is your doing,my darling)

                                                      i fear

no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want

no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)

and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant

and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows

higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

                                               -e e cummings

Applegate Lake

It is finally warming up to some really warm temperatures around here.  Since it was getting so hot this past weekend, we decided to go in search of some water to play in - enter Applegate Lake!

After a beautiful drive, we arrived at the lake with our picnic lunch:

The beach was perfect for Cole to play - a gentle sloping sandy beach into the cold (but not freezing) water:

My favorite kinds of days - sitting in the sun, watching Cole play happily. 

 Sticks + rocks + water = one VERY happy little boy!

 
 

 

 Oh yes...we were THOSE parents, the ones who let their child play in the water in their clothes...we've been so busy with moving, I haven't had a chance to go buy Cole a swimsuit for this summer!  You KNOW I'm busy when I haven't had time to go shopping for my little mister!

Swimming lessons with Daddy!

 

Summer days!

Swings

Swings are Cole's favorite:

 

 

 

 

 

 
 

Four Seasons

A study of Cole in the four seasons:

Summer:

Autumn:

Winter:

Spring:

Ranting and Raving

Can I just take a sec to rant and rave over here?

I have several large pet peeves related to parenting.  After all, parenting is a skill I have spent my life researching and I have several strong opinions on many aspects. 

But one of the BIGGEST pet peeves is the ridiculous American notion of entertaining children. 

It can be so frustrating for me to go the park.  I see parent after parent directing their child(ren) on the equipment. "Let's go play over here, Johnny."  "Why don't you go down the slide?"  "Look, there's a scavenger  hunt, where's the rocket ship?"

What is wrong with our culture that we don't trust our children to be responsible for their own entertainment?  Why do we constantly feel the need to push them, to tell them how to play and what to play?  Why do we put small children on our laps and take them down the slide because they aren't ready to do it by themselves - which, if they aren't ready to do it on their own, they should not be doing it! Parents are setting their kids up for failure - and even injury - when they take control of their kids' playtime. 

Cole and I spend time outside almost every single day - and we are often at a park.  I have never "showed" or told Cole what to play or how to play at the park.  I stand and observe; Cole plays.  I am present and watching, but not telling him what to do or encouraging him to anything.  And guess what?  Cole is FINE.  He is perfectly happy and capable to play without me ruining it.

What's more important is that by trusting Cole to play completely on his own, I am trusting him to know and create his own boundaries.  He doesn't get "stuck" at the top of the tall slide, because he is completely in charge of when he feels safe to go up there and come down independently.  He learns problem solving, without an adult to do it for him.  He learns that he alone is responsible for his own entertainment. 

So, so often as a parent, I find myself saying to people, "Please, just stand back and observe.  Please DON'T play with my son until he invites you to, on his terms.  Please allow him to own and direct his play, because that's the most important job he'll ever do and your "help" is actually a huge hindrance.  Please, just let him discover instead of showing him."

If there was one thing I would change about the way Americans parent, it would be this: Trust your child.  Trust your child to know just what they need to do, when they need to do it, without forcing, directing, or showing them how.  Just step back and let the kids play.

Baby Ro

Hanging out with Baby Rowen last weekend:

Home

Some big news around here...


We bought (another) house!

Here it is:

Of course, many more pictures to come of the inside (plus all our before and after!).  Right now, I'm just so relieved and excited to have a permanent home!
We've been sorta in limbo for almost four years now...moving to one place for a year, than another for another year, then our current home that was originally supposed to be just a quick rent until we bought our permanent home...but that was over a year and half ago.  This will be my eleventh move - and I am so excited to be settled permanently.

This house will be our home for years.  This is where our children will grow up.  We will make growth charts on the walls, paint whatever colors we choose, landscape the yard and buy a swingset, hang pictures.  This is where we will bring our next baby home from the hospital.  This is where we will have birthday parties and Christmas trees.  This is where we will have friends and family visit. 

It feels like home.  And I can't wait to move in and make it all ours!