As I've mentioned before, Cole doesn't talk. He babbles and says some beginning sounds, but he's way behind on his speech development.
So far behind, in fact, that he's been referred to a speech pathologist for testing.
Now, this is a GOOD thing. At least that's what I keep telling myself. If he does have a speech delay or some sort of impediment, now's the time to get it taken care of. Better to get a head start and get things moving so by the time he starts school he'll be talking just like the other kids.
But even as I advocate for my son and request testing - because the pediatrician wasn't too concerned, but in my mama heart I knew something wasn't quite right - even as I make the phone calls to schedule the appointments, there's a sliver of doubt and dread in my mind.
Did I do something wrong? Did I fail him as his mama? Is his speech delay a result of me?
Sometimes I can brush away these fears. Haven't I done everything right? Haven't I researched and planned and made changes just so Cole could have every possible advantage? We don't expose him to TV, because of the risk of speech delay. I talk to him frequently, narrating our actions to help him catch on. When he babbled as an infant, I babbled back to him to teach him the cadence of conversation. I never interrupt him. I patiently tell him the word of each object when he points curiously to it.
Haven't I done everything right? What did I do wrong?
Is it even my fault that he's not talking yet? How much of a child's development is nature and how much is nurture?